The 5K That Wasn't

A month or two ago I heard about the first West Seattle 5-K Run/Walk along Alki Beach. In a moment of insanity I decided I wanted to sign up for it. I say insanity, because I've been struggling for the past year in getting my fitness back after some health challenges, am currently suffering from some lingering plantar fasciitis, and was thrilled when I actually walked 1-1/2 miles recently - the longest walk I've done in years - and this is only half of a 5K. Based on the previous walk, I knew it would take me (at least) 3 hours to do a 5K walk. And adding to the physical stress of this was that it was set for the day of a day cars were not allowed on Alki due to some Seattle summer streets program, so anywhere I parked would require some walking to get to the beginning of the walk, and that was the case if I could even get a bus up there. Part of my thought of doing this was sort of a benchmark of where I am fitness-wise - so when I did the same walk next year, I could say "wow, look how far I've come!" Well, lucky for me, when I "decided" that I would do the 5K, I never actually signed up for it. I kept procrastinating - probably knowing deep down in my heart that I wasn't ready - and then I "decided" that I would just go the same day and sign up for it then, if I really wanted to do it, or perhaps the previous day's signup. So I woke up this past Sunday, the day of the walk. The sun was very strong - which is something that zaps the energy out of me totally. It was warm, which is also isn't good for me. And I thought to myself, there is no way in hell that I am going to do this walk. And if I did, I will hurt myself. I decided to reframe the whole thing. I wanted a benchmark? Here it is: I am currently not able to do a 5K walk. There's no shame in admitting it. It's not a character judgment; it just is. I was not ready for a variety of reasons. And that's really okay. A lot of people did it and had fun. And maybe next year that will be me. So what can I do to get ready for this myself, perhaps next year? Some self-care would be nice. I'm getting ready to go away for a week, so I'll admit I'm not getting to the gym this week. And the Donut Diet is still lingering around. I'm hopeful that the change in scenery of my trip, and the change in routine (I'm taking a class, rather than working) will shake up my routine. And maybe I can come back a few steps closer to being the person I want to be, not the person that I've fallen into and not liking very much.